Something on Talking

What has happened to the art of talking? Not too long ago, it seems, people loved to engage in conversations, even escalating them into arguments at times. While I detest arguing, I do like discussions. It doesn’t seem as though a great deal of gabbing of any sort is occurring these days though. Too many of us (and I include myself in this group) have our eyes glued to our cell phones or iPads and computer monitors. Adults and children, alike, must spend countless hours playing games, staring intently at bright, little screens. Folks don’t even look up when they’re walking because they’re too busy reading emails, or aps, or Facebook messages. (Need I say anything about texting and driving?) Don’t get me wrong. Social media definitely has its place; indeed, it does appear it is “the place”. I’m engaged as well. However, I do worry sometimes about all of us actually forgetting how to talk to one another with old-fashioned openness.

I took a course in communications long ago and was taught that communication depends on one person speaking while another listens and then responds indicating that he or she had actually “heard”. I was taught, that in my culture, it was best to look another person in the eyes, not to avert my gaze, or beam my view up to the ceiling or scatter it about the room. Sadly, though, opportunities for such interactions look to be decreasing these days.

Generally it appears we are being talked at, not with, and there’s a difference in my mind. Just watch Fox News or MSNBC and it is perfectly clear. (I’m trying to be politically correct here by mentioning both ends of the spectrum.) I suppose I could respond with a Tweet, but how personal is that and would anyone really read it?

Few politicians listen any more, friends don’t always stay connected, and family members are too entrenched in their busy lives to chat with one another on a regular basis. A few exceptions exist. Place a babbling baby in front of us, and what do we do? The toughest of the tough will likely coo back. And what about our pets? I talk to my dogs every day. They tilt their heads, cock their ears, and tell me wordlessly that they know I’m speaking to them and they love it. Are we robbing ourselves though? Are we missing out on something?

I normally am a quiet person, but can “talk up a storm” given the right situation. Thank goodness I have friends and family members who allow that to happen. In my world sometimes talking has to take a back seat to writing, just like now, but I’m saving up some thoughts to spring on a few unsuspecting souls who will sit still long enough to “hear me out”. Suffice to say, I look forward to the next conversation.